Violence Post Silence (Rhyme not intended)

Violence Post Silence (Rhyme not intended)
I do not know what he gained from it, his weird stare right in the morning. Once he saw me coming he started walking at an angle so that he could reach in close proximity, for what? a better view? Saare uncle log subah subah park  mein yoga kar rahe hain, is anokhe insaan ka dimaag kahin aur hi hai!
At times I stare back, at times I stop with arms folded and smile, when younger I would hit, this time I just moved on, I have too many priorities to think about, than to waste my time on a nymphomaniac , or so I thought and remained silent. … I went out in the day, came back late evening and within this short duration of commuting, I had a few more perverts to ignore. It is like home work piling up after each bell, a daily grotesque ritual.
The drunk cycle rickshaw puller whose rickshaw I jumped off from, the ten or more men who sat on charpoys along the bridge and watched me do so, giving their necks a hard time;
(( Bell ))
The auto rickshaw driver who refused to follow the route I was describing
(( Bell ))
The two jerks in the car while we were stuck in traffic (if only that man would listen to me and not take the longer route! and if only he wouldn’t turn back so often!)
(( Bell ))
The men who walked by as I walked home from market;
(( Bell ))
The men sitting in their car and drinking;
(( Bell ))
The man in the car which had to stop for me (i think he stared more out of hatred) and so on.
(((( Longer bel l))))
—–home——
If you think it is easier or more convenient to ignore, it is not.
It could cause you neck troubles, because you strain to look away, and at times if being stared at from different angles, you got to find a weird angle for your own neck as well, to avoid every freakin eyeball.
It is not easy, it requires a lot of thought and energy to maintain this version of “peace”. If your mother tells you its safer, it is not. Silence encourages idiots to be bullies and you restrict your own self with your fears. And fear is unsafe for your health.
AT times you take drastic steps out of frustration, which gets built over time. I have used the pepper spray to almost brutal results, not too often though. When it is in my hand, I try and draw power from it, which I could have drawn from within myself, if I weren’t scared, which would happen if I were not told to ignore, to keep quiet and to keep this daily shit within me.
In the end, some day you might get violent, so its better to use lesser energy on dialogue, complaint or being stern etc every day.
No matter what you do, you can’t miss that stare, and to ignore itself, becomes a task, a horrible home-work. And I so regret that I wasted my energy in ignoring them. might as well have taught a lesson or two. Next time, next time for sure!
a tiring day…indeed..

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